me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
