this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
