problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
We were destined to go to rehab together
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
