I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
