Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
