idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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