I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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