she smelled like a LAN party
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
