Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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