I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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