Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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