I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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