Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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