I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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