didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
