he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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