Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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