in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
