would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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