i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
