Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
