My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Farmville is her only friend.
You're like the curious george of whores
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
