Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
