I think my vagina is haunted
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
