what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize
