so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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