If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
