the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
