So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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