There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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