Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
