Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
