we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
