i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
