I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
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