Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i think i scared a bird with my dick
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Randomize
