He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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