Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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