his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
