I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Duck Duck Cougar?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
