Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
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