is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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