im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
