I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
