They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
