So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
