ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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