I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
