You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
