At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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